Return to Johto Expansion
by E-arth Duelist
Summary: Between chapters 30 and 31 of Pokemon Unova Expansion.
1. Cooking Story

Return to Johto Expansion

Chapter 1: Cooking Story

"We're back to Johto!" Hayley shouted.

"You were never in Johto Expansion" Chatot explained. "Whereas I..."

"Were not even considered" TJ laughed. "I, at least, got a cameo first."

"Dude, check it out" Jerry remarked. "It's Olivine City! Kalvin, coming back to Johto was a great idea!"

Meanwhile, in the shadows, a man chuckled as he watched the get off of a large ship. "I was expecting only three to show up, but I see they brought their little friends. I'll get them and their coo coo bird too!" He watched them head toward the city and turned on his walkie talkie. "Yo, this is Pea. Calling Croc."

"It's peacock!" a voice yelled on the other end. "Ugh, honestly, you hired us to do a job and yet you can't even spend money on cellphones? And why are we attacking these six again?"

"For revenge" the man replied. "Lots of revenge. Now, listen up. Here's the plan..."

As they walked, a man turned up behind Hayley and yelled at her. "Yo! This is a my kitchen! Now gets out!"

"No, you get out!" she yelled back angrily.

"No, my kitchen, my rules. If you don't like it, tough noodles for you. And by tough noodles, I mean, you won't get my noodle! Soup!"

"I don't want your noodles or soup!" she cried. "In fact, I challenge you to a battle for this kitchen. If I win, I get to keep your kitchen and everyone eats for free. If you lose, I get the kitchen and everyone gets a free ponyride from the carnival."

"We're in a restaurant?" TJ asked.

"I'll accept the battle, however, we wil, be fighting a kitchen battle!"

"Kitchen battle?" Hayley asked, stunned.

"It's a battle that takes place in this kitchen. It will be to see who can cook the best dish. Meanwhile, our pokemon can try to attack our dishes and our selves. One pokemon each, whoever makes the best dish wins. Got it?"

"I can cook?" Hayley asked, turning to her friends.

"About as well as Walker can" Jerry said. "Actually, scratch that. Walker sucks at cooking. So, good luck!"

"Cap'n, I see a nickel!" Chatot squaked, pointing to the floor.

"Really?" Jerry asked, searching.

"Tricked you!" Chatot laughed. "Cap'n, I see a quarter!"

"No, I'm too smart for this" Jerry said, folding his arms. On the ground, the poor quarter was sad. Nobody would pick him up.

**Quarter's Sad Song:**

"I want to be picked up. I want to be played with. I want to be rolled all over someone's bed, tucked in at night in a pocket...left in a purse, used to buy somethoing neat or perverse..."

TJ picked him up and threw him into the sea. "This is my segment. Mine. Nobody steals my segment, but Jerry, Chatot and everybody else! But, no quarters singing sad songs about..."

"TJ, do you need some special brownies?" Kalvin asked, holding up a tray of brownies.

"What did you do them?"

"Love."

"No."

"Um...grass?"

"No."

"Chocolate bunnies and tarter sauce?"

"...Kalvin, what do you see when you look at me?"

"Mr. President, I see a man on three legs."

"What?" TJ asked.

"Nah, only joking. I'm using Crunch bars as an additcion now and let me tell you, this stuff is good. Crunchy, like salt."

"Salt isn't crunchy" Kim said.

Hayley began her cooking battle with Chef Cheesesteak, her using Gardevoir and him battling with Girafarig. "Gradevoir, watch Girafarig closely." She put some items into an oven and cooked on high for thirty five. When it was done, she quickly took it out.

"Use Psychic on her dish!" Chef Cheesesteak ordered. Girafarig began lifting her dish and then sent it flying. Hayley caught the plate and then looked at Gardevoir. "Use Healing Wiosh to make this dish taste good." Gardevoir made the dish taste good and the gang began to taste it.

"Is it better than my curry sauce blend of peppers and ground chuck gravy, sliced with avacodos?" Chef Cheesesteak asked.

"Yep" Kalvin said. "Hayley, wonderful job making ice cream."

"Thank you" she smiled, throwing out a carton of ice cream and a stew of meats and vegetables.


	2. Crunch of the Tiger

Pokemon

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Chapter 2: Crunch of the Tiger

Cherrygrove City was full of laughter on Halloween night. Jerry was chatting up his Hayley's friends from the beach, dressed as a pirate while Kalvin was in his usual costume. Yes, he dressed as a princess. Not by choice, he was forced to. Walker and TJ hid his crunch bars and he needed his crunch bars. To crunch. Addictions are bad.

"Cap'n, maybe we should see if Kalvin needs some manly company" Chatot squaked.

Jerry shook his head. "Chatot, we have some fine ladies who are...what did you say your ages were?"

"24 and 29" they said.

"Older chicks. And you want me to go spend time with Kalvin? It isn't my fault he's dressed as a girl. I told him his crunch bar addiction wouldn't be pretty. Now ladies, if we may go and play Strip Monopoly."

"How do you play?" the 29 year old asked.

"Every time we get money or lose money or take a turn, we..."

"Kids read this" Chatot whispered.

"...Well then, maybe they shouldn't" Jerry responded.

"But, E-arth Duelist would lose all of his readers!" Chatot squaked.

The E-arth Duelist walked up to Jerry. "Hey. This is a kid's show...well, not really. Jerry, do I have to remind you about what happened when Morki18 was being funny and decided to not listen?"

"You've never told me that" Jerry frowned.

"Oh...well, he did." E-arth Duelist left without explaining, though he mumbled about how Morki18 never listened to him much after the Wicked Eraser incidant. Moving on with the story...

Kalvin stood on the beach, his dress blowing in the wind as he felt a man approaching. "Sword!" he cried, slashing a pen into the skull of...a skeleton. "How did you?" Kalvin asked.

"How did I what?" the skeleton asked, revealing himself to be Proton in disguise.

"Proton!" Kalvin yelled. "You're dead!"

"No, I'm in costume."

"How did you die?" Kalvin asked.

Hayley handed Kalvin a pokeball. "This is to make up for the cruel prank that the boys played on you." He released the pokemon inside, a Marril.

"So, you want to battle?" Proton asked, pulling out a pokeball. "Meet Mrs. Suzy!" He sent out his seel.

"Mrs. Suzy?" Kalvin enquired. "That's lame."

"So is a grown man crossdressing" Proton said.

"That wasn't my fault!" Kalvin exclaimed.

"Sure it was. I never knew you to be the type..."

"But, I wanted my crunch bars!" Kalvin raged. "I'm gonna...I'm gonna...Eat a crunch bar!" He bit into his crunch bar with the force of a tiger, eyes of a tiger, fur of a tig...Wait a second, did a tiger steal Kalvin's crunch bars?

"Those poor crunch bars" Kalvin sighed. "Marril, use..."

"Ice Shard!" Proton ordered. Seel hit Marril with a chunk of ice. "Ice Shard goes first, always. Does the girl need her hand held?"

Kalvin frowned. "Marril, use Aqua Tail. And since my Marril has the ability Huge Power, all of Marril's attacks do double damage." Marril hit Seel and Seel went down.

Proton returned his Pokemon. "That's the last straw" he growled.

"No, but this is" Walker said, holding a single straw.

:"Get out of the chapter!" Chatot yelled.

"How come Jerry and Kalvin are starring in this and I can't?" Walker asked.

Hayley gave Walker a pokeball. "This is a Chinchou."

Walker frowned and then smiled. "Yay! A Chinchou!"


	3. Kim's Journal

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Chapter 3: Kim's Journal

The group was in Ice Path, doing the most serious kind of training. "Marril! Use Aqua Tail!" Kalvin yelled. Marril's tail hit the ice and caused the ice to break, making the group fall into the icy below of the cave.

"Kalvin!" Chatot yelled. "You caused us to get trapped down here just so you could use Marril's Aqua Tail to flatten your pancake!" The pancake fell with them and Kalvin picked it up and ate it.

"It's a little frozen, but it still tastes good" Kalvin admitted.

"Kalvin!" Jerry screamed. "Spit out Chatot!" Kalvin looked at him.

"Dude, this is my pancake."

"You never had a pancake, TJ ate it on you when we entered the cave. You caused us to fall down into Ice Path and now we're trapped and you ate my bird!"

"...tastes like a pancake."

"I actually do" Chatot admitted, climbing out of Kalvin's mouth. "I bathed syrup today and man, it works a lot of joints out of my wings."

"I like chicken wings" Kalvin said, licking his lips.

"No. Bad Kalvin! Go in the corner." Kalvin sat in the corner while Kim started writing a journal.

Journal Entry 3: "Well, I lost the first two and I think we may be stuck here for some time. Jerry started talking to us about combees and Ursarings. Well, what he could find in the pokedex before Walker used it for heat for our fire. Still not sure why the ice didn't melt, but...Kalvin is going insane the quickest. Today, he ate a Pikachu...alarm clock. It was TJ's so I lent it to him. Well, it looks like it's getting late and it's my turn to heat up some food."

Journal Entry 10: I started writing numbers 4 - 9, but I gave up and decided to have fun. Today, TJ got beat up by Bearctics for stealing their can of Coka Cola. Not sure why, but Bearctics really love coka cola. I helped them. Walker took an intrest in my journal and said that he likes me. Of course, he was just trying to get to my chocolate bar so I told him I was onto him and set the Bearctics on him. Surprisingly, thery still attacked TJ...Jerry got Walker some food from a pear tree inside the cave and Hayley and Kalvin went in search of an exit. They haven't returned, but I'm not surprised. I wanted to go, but the journal needed writing in. Well, time to burn a steak. And my chocolate bar...no, Walker, I am not giving you this chocolate bar!"

Journal Entry 19: The beartic are very aggressive, but luckily, TJ keeps drawing them over to him by allowing me to trip him so they can attack him. Well, he didn't allow it, but...Jerry starting to get weird. Very weird. He asked how I would taste with syrup and Chatot kept asking when I was going to be well done or medium rare. Not sure why, but I think they're going to eat me."

Journal Entry 20: Now, I have nothing to write about. I just wanted to make this entry.

Journal 28: Still trapped, not sure why, but the bearctic have left. I'm disappointed in them, TJ's recovered and kept an eye out for other monsters. I'm glad he's around to protect us and he's a good friend. Also, I think he's cute...He's caught on to me. I was trying to get his chocolate bar, but he ate it so I tripped him and he hit a cave exit...wait a minute...I think we're going to leave.

Kim exited the cave first and grabbed a hold of her journal. "I love this journal, I may use it in the future. I'll call her...Journal Grant. For Hugh Grant, but as a journal."

Jerry looked at Kim. "My battle with Petrel was interesting."

"I don't remember you battling..." Kim admitted.

"I battled Petrel. During the cave in. It was on day 21 when we were trapped. You asked for my coffee beans."

"Oh...no, I don't remember it."

Flashback

:

Jerry noticed Petrel walking inside of the cave. "Dude, it's Petrel!"

Petrel smiled at him. "Oh, hello target,. Our boss said that you need to be taken out. That's why I lured you here with fake ads for camera repairs,"

":What ads?" Jerry asked.

"You mean I wasted seven-hundred dollars on ads you didn't even see?"

"Look, Petrel. I'm not in the mood for Team Rocket's latest scheme."

"Neither am I. But, my Abomasnow will send shivers down your timbers." He sent out the frosty pokemon.

""Dude...that's so wrong, I can't even comment."

"Cap'n, I'm upset because you used my radio phone to call Jenkins" Chatot squaked.

"It isn't like he said anything. That's why mimes are so unreliable...well, maybe it's just that Jenkins doesn't like us. That must be it. Chatot, can you take care of the abominable snowman?"

"Um...Cap'n, I'm not sure that Dewott can't do it..."

"Chatot..."

"I broke my wing."

"You're flying."

"Um...oh yeah, my wife is having a baby."

"Congratula...wait, you're not even married!"

"And that's weird because?" Chatot asked, flying off.

"Chatot, how about I give you a chocolate bar?"

"Well, I guess I can battle." He got into a fighting pose and began flying around Abomasnow. It began to hail and Jerry put on his bike helmet.

"Mist!" Petrel cried. Abomasnow covered the cave in mist.

"This is so misty..." Jerry said. "Chatot, use Air Cutter!" Chatot flapped his wings and hit Abomasnow was sent backwards.

"Abomasnow, use Blizzard!" Abomasnow took out a copy of world of warcraft and flung it at Chatot.

"It has pandas!" Chatot cried, happy.

"Focus, Chatot!" Jerry coached.

"Right. There isn't even a computer here. Air Cutter!" Chatot flapped his wings and knocked out Abomasnow and Petrel fled.

Flashback End:

"I don't remember it" Kim replied.


	4. National Mystery

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Chapter 4: National Mystery

"So, National Park's bug catching contest is going on" Hayley said. "This is a good oppertunity to find some wonderful new pokemon, right Jerry?" Jerry had already caught a Pinsir.

"Pinchers, the Pinsir" he replied. "That's your new name. Pinchers."

Walker was hiding out, bored when he was grabbed by a stranger and led to an area, a note leaving a clue to the kidnapper's identity. Kim found it while looking for a bench to sit down at and read it. "Dear friends of Walker, you are going to have to battle your way through my bored game. I meant board game. You have an hour to get ready or else I'll blow him up with vannila frosting...that's what I plan to put on my brownies. Whoever reads this note, hi and walker is safe. For now. Make sure you bring something blue and some coka cola."

"Like this?" TJ asked, holding a can of coka cola. An army of Bearctic appeared and began pummling him. "Wait! This is a pepsi." They stopped, confused. "This is a coka cola." He pulled out a real can of coka cola and the Bearctic attacked.

Jerry smiled. "I know the culprit!" He drank some tea and pointed at Jenkins. "You were mad at Walker because he always mistranslated your words. You are fishy, Jenkins." Chatot took the fish off of a Jenkin's shoulder and Jerry continued. "Where's our friend?"

Jenkins blinked and ran away, only for TJ to pummel him into a pancake. Wait, no he just assualted a pancake. Kalvin's pancake. "Kalvin, don't do anything rash."

Kalvin looked at him. "Okay."

Jerry turned on Kalvin. "You stole Walker! You took him because...I have no idea. But, you're suspisious. I think you did it to hide your own crunch bar addiction."

"What about me?" TJ asked. "Could I have done it since he kept destroying my banjos?"

"It's possible, but no. Kim, arrest Kalvin and Jenkins. Now...TJ, what were your motives for the crime?"

"Cap'n, you just said TJ didn't do it" Chatot squaked.

"Chatot...are you trying to hide something? I trhink you are. You kidnapped Walker!"

"I can't hold a pen" Chatot admitted.

"But, you can type a letter."

"It was written in pen."

"But, you could have typed it. Kim, arrest him too." He looked at himself. "And you...you are the most guilty...wait, why am I accusing myself?"

Whitney appeared with Walker kidnapped. "I'm right here!" she screamed.

Jerry looked at her and Walker. "Hmmm...no clues, no culprit. Well, let's go home."

"But, I'm right here" Whitney replied.

Jerry smiled. "I know who did it! Chuck, from the Cianwood City..."

"Cap'n, I think Whitney may have done it" Chatot squaked.

"Chatot, I'm trying to find our friend. He could be anywhere." He looked at Walker. "If only I knew where to start looking..."

"Cap'n, you're looking right at him."

"You're right, Chatot. It is like he's right here, even though he's not. Chatot, as good friends of Walker's, we'll find him."

"I already did, Cap'n. He's right there." He pointed to Walker being tied up to a railroad wedding track.

"I see, Chatot. Walker means so much to you. Don't worry, we'll find him."

"Cap'n! You can see him right in front of you!"

Jerry blinked. "I know, but this was more dramatic and funny." Kim arrested Whitney for being a stalker, but she got out of jail. Oh, and TJ caught a Ledian.


	5. Lake of Tail

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Chapter 5: Lake of Tail

The Lake of Rage was hosting a competition for fishing and..."I've got one!" Walker shouted. He pulled on the fishing line and got Jenkins's cousin, Pauline. Pauline gave a gesture...a handshake, not that! And then she left. She's also a mime.

Jerry watched her go. "That's some nice tail."

Walker frowned. "Jerry, where's the tail?"

"What do you mean?"

"Jerry...I know you have a tail."

"Cap'n, I think he's onto us" Chatot whispered.

"Look, I saw some nice tail. Now, don't tell me you don't want some of her tail?"

Walker looked at him. "Well, she is attractive..."

"Huh? I was talking about a slowpoke tail, man." He saw Pauline hand a man one as a prize for the fishing contest. "Man...that is some nice piece of tail."

TJ and Kalvin were walking when they spotted a man in purple clothes, with a purple hat on his head. He was simply purple. "My friends" he said, greeting them with money.

"I love banjos" TJ greeted,

"Banjos? Yuck!"

"You are no friend of mine, mr...um..."

"Mr. Purple" he said. "My Politoad is ramped for a battle and I'll give a slowpoke tail to anyone who can defeat me using a water pokemon." He sent out his Politoad,

"Kalvin, battle him with your Poliwrath and get me that slowpoke tail" Jerry said from the sidelines.

"We're behind you, Kalvin" Chatot squaked.

"Um...Thanks. But, my Poliwrath isn't in the battling..." Poliwrath came out and attacked Politoad. "...Let's battle."

"Very well" Mr. Purple said, cheerfully. "My purple clock says I have about ten minutes before I take a purple sponge bath with my purple teddy bear, Mr. Fluffbunny."

"That's a watch" Walker said. "And why is your teddy bear named Fluffbunny?"

"Mr. Fluffbunny is my oldest friend. In fact, I have a flashback..."

"Nobody cares!" Kalvin cried.

"I do!" Jerry screamed.

"Well, it's like it was yesterday..."

Flashback:

"I was known as just Purple then. I don't know why, but I was lonely. I began my [pokemon journey in a flower field and cvame across this little teddy bear with a cute face and named him Mr. Fluffbunny. He was cute, like a purple cutey. In fact, he was so purple and cute that I put him into a purse and in my purse, I kept fifty yards of tape. Video tape. You know, VHS..."

End Flashback:

"Wait! I remember now! We were talking about my flashback!"

Flashback: Again

"...Oh, right! Mr. Fluffbunny! So I took him home with me, to my rich mansion, the old and dusty one. I have five, four purple and one that was colored in mime color. I figured it was best to not touch it so I used it for a park. A Pokemon park. For purple pokemon. And purple..."

Flashback End:

"And that's why I hate mimes and banjos" Mr. Purple replied.

"You weren't even...Poliwrath, use Hypnosis."

"Bounce!" Mr. Purple ordered. Politoad dodged the attack.

"Use Doubleslap." Poliwrath began slapping Politoad.

"Your pokemon isn't purple" Mr. Purple cried. "Hyper Voice." Politoad sang loudly.

Jerry looked at Pauline. "Man, that is some nice tail. Ma'am, can I touch your tail? Can I rub it? Can I squeeze it?"

"Dude, you are being so..." Jerry smiled as Pauline let him touch her cosplay horse tail.

"I got you again" Jerry grinned.

"Poliwrath! Doubleslap him!" Poliwrath slapped Politoad again. Politoad was about to attack, however...

"Picnic break!" an announcer yelled. Everyone ran to eat their picnic food.

Poliwrath slapped Politoad and Politoad sang loudly. Poliwrath double-slapped Politoad and knocked out Politoad.

Jerry smiled at Walker. "Man, I liked being able to touch Pauline's tail."

"Her slowpoke tail?" Walker asked.

"Maybe" Jerry smiled.


End file.
